White Wedding Looming

The Ahab of all bridezillas will be married this weekend in central Virginia. The werewolf accepted the invitation and will be driving down to view what is sure to be a spectacle of failed expectations, tortured over-planning and a strung-out groom and bridesmaids. The werewolf has been accosted by the bride-to-be on Facebook and via text messages reminding him of the event he has already RSVP'd to. Crazy is a gentle term for this gal. Anyhow, he is looking forward to catching up with several business school chums who will also be attending this tribute to madness. While it has been a rather heinous and in-glamorous year for the werewolf, he hopes his friends and colleagues will have sweeter tales of happiness and success to share.

The werewolf has been known to be an agent provocateur at times. The off-kilter nature of this friendly bridezilla has inspired him to come-up with the some sort of sincere back-handed compliment that will simultaneously flatter and confuse her about the wedding she tortured herself over. Sinister and slightly sadistic, perhaps. However, the anticipated flummoxed look on her face and her inability to make sense of it may make the whole exercise worthwhile. I hope I am not as evil as that sounds. Should you have any experience in this realm, please advise, as I am open to suggestions for the perfect delivery.

"Luv Gov"Mark Sanford dropped 'faithful' from vows from marriage: Preempted honesty in a painful form?

Just when we thought we had collectively forgotten about South Carolina's infamous "luv gov," Andy Barr, from the Politico pens the bizarrely revealing article "Mark Sanford dropped 'faithful' from vows."

The article explicitly states "South Carolina Gov. Mark Sanford refused to include a promise to be faithful in his wedding vows, according to his wife, Jenny." Several things snap to werewolf's brain upon reading this weird revelation. Firstly, this is not to blame Jenny Sanford, but it looks like Mark sent a very direct signal to her from an early point that he did not take fidelity seriously. She allowed it to be omitted from the contractual vows that are the foundation of marriage. In a weird twists of fate, was she a victim of her own naivety, and he just an actor operating within the perceived construct of their marriage contract? However, Mark clearly felt guilty about his actions and he tried to hide them, in many ways suggesting he wasn't comfortable enough with that omitted clause to be forthright and honest with his spouse. The werewolf thinks very poorly of Governor on account of his behavior, but can't help but acknowledge that the boundaries of weirdness in this instance make this case of a "cheating politician" somewhat exceptional. 

Cheating politicians are sadly an accepted norm in society and nothing new. 

Giuliani and Gingrich: The same old guys that ditch their wives for their misstresses. Boring and standard.

Clinton: Classic horn dog, who's too cowardly to properly confess when caught, has a taste for fat chicks, and has a wife who puts up with his shit to advance her career politically.

McGreevy: Cheating politicians are gay. Really sucks to be his wife. A national first.

Spitzer: Cheating politicians like sleazy Jersey-shore-esque hookers. Confirmed what everybody knew. 

Edwards: Co-opts wife's fatal cancer to advance phony image of crusading populist douche-bag, all while he is really just another narcissistic tool extraordinaire, who happens to have taken his dalliances to new level of irresponsibility and creepiness. Sadly, the media covered for him and he was exposed by the National Enquirer. He may be the most shameless and disgusting of the bunch.

Sanford: Never promises to be faithful to spouse in first place, spouse accepts that term; lies to everyone about jet-setting to Argentina to see his Latin babe; calls his mistress his soul mate on national television, seems to accept his fate. Weirdly, there is an honesty to this guy's actions. The behavior is disciple, consequences deserved, the pain very real, but the dude did not violate the vow, since it was omitted on the front.